From “Never mind…” to Being Kind to Yourself đź’–
A beautiful example from an ongoing transformation journey
Over the past few weeks, I’ve been fortunate enough to witness such a beautiful process that I simply have to share it with you. Not because it’s spectacular in the sense of major breakthroughs or enormous steps… but precisely because it’s so real. So human.
I’m currently coaching an older woman through a transformation journey. In our first session, we delved into her intentions and the foundation of the process. After that, she started working at home: just 15 minutes a day with affirmations and exercise.
Week 2: The First Change
During a feedback session, she said: “I notice I’m more positive.”
And believe me… that’s golden. Not because everything suddenly changes, but because that’s the moment someone feels that change is possible.
Week 3: Awareness of Needs
A week later, she realized she needed some rest. And instead of complaining about everything that still needed to be done, she expressed her needs. That’s a huge difference.
Recognizing boundaries.
Expressing needs.
Taking your own process seriously.
That’s growth.
The second session: No breakthrough… and just right.
Our second session was a bit of a catch-up. She was hoping for a breakthrough, but it didn’t happen.
And that’s okay.
In fact, sometimes that’s exactly what’s needed.
I let go of my own expectations—and that created space for what was to come.
And then—two weeks later…
Yesterday she called me.
“I can’t do it anymore,” she said. “I don’t do my affirmations or my exercises. I have too much to do. I’m not as positive as I was in the beginning. “
And me? I was actually very happy.
Because this means she’s reached the stage of conscious incompetence.
She notices it. She feels what’s changing… and what’s not working yet.
Before, she was clearly in the phase of unconscious incompetence—not knowing what you don’t know. But now?
Now she’s waking up.
“What should I do now? I don’t know what to do first.”
Her question was simple and the answer too: prioritize your personal exercises. Always! Just start over.
Don’t give up. Don’t be hard on yourself.
First do you personal exercises. Then whatever is next.
Because when you feel good about yourself, everything becomes easier afterward.
And the best moment?
She said:
“Before, I would have thought: never mind. But now I know… I can just start over.”
đź’– Be kind to yourself, people. That’s where real growth begins.
Love,
Stieneke
